A friend asked me the other day how I am coping with my first wife having cancer and I didn’t really want to talk about it to be honest. I usually end up sweating from my eyes if one scratches the surface with delving questions.
Not one to be rude though, I did reply saying probably the hardest thing is seeing the ol’ girl when she looks sick as fuck. Walking up the stairs to find her asleep on the couch, looking pasty, pale or even Simpsons like yellow and basically not looking real flash and is simply a cunt of a feeling. Every parent whose had a sick baby at hospital would know a similar feeling of utter helplessness. Not every day because there are good days and bad days but it absolutely breaks ya heart, man!
And that’s just the third party people like myelf. Imagine how the one dealing with it feels. Poor girl…
But apparently there is a counter action for battling bowel cancer and it’s called shopping.
Thanks to some of you who gave my maid shopping vouchers for her 50th birthday she recuperated phenomenally over a number of days thanks to shopping.
Seriously though, that form of therapeutic treatment should be in medical journals.
(Un)fortunately I had what I am lead to believe was the privilege of accompanying my housemaid during these therapeutic excursions.
It was soooo much fun….!!!
In fact I feel very sad she has now used all her vouchers and as such she has no need to return to any shopping centres for a very long time (fingers crossed).
We had an appointment with our baby faced surgeon Peter a couple weeks ago. He really is a good cunt and even recently had a lecture with our oncologist who I’m not allowed to call a gnome even though he looks like one. Just shows they are specialists in their area but with Peter I’m starting to wonder if he organises these appointments because he just needs a laugh.
It wasn’t until she lay on Peter’s examination bed and pulled up her dress for him to examine her surgery scars that she realised she was wearing an old raggedy pair of undies with so many frayed holes and rips they looked like sexy lacy lingerie, or at least a back woods redneck version of them.
Thinking this may be why she got herself some new undies during her shopping excursions.
She’s actually been feeling pretty good lately to be honest. Managed to go on a few walks to our local dog beach with Bella and that’s a 6km turnaround so could be worse. Problem is she, because of her chemo she has to hide from the sun so often looks like a Muslim sheila in that full body covering get up some of ’em wear. I know quite a few Muslims and they’re all good bastards so no issue my end but does suck on hot days.
Kodi came for a visit the other day and with that comes your quote of the day…
Kodi (serious as fuck): Where’s the Gary Coleman?
Me and the first wife: Huh, Gary Coleman?
Kodi: Yeah the sandwich maker grill I always use.
Me and the first wife: Oh, you mean the George Foreman (laughter).
For those old enough to remember Gary Coleman in Different Strokes and his ‘What you talking about Willis?’ line and George Foreman the boxer and not just his grill should see the irony in the similarities between the two.
Our young cuzzie Kimberley is back from abroad and came out to surprise us and play with some wigs with the mrs. Why let them have all the fun right…
Finally, a couple young fellas have been charged with robbery from an incident in Cleveland just after midnight Saturday where our young fella Dilan was the victim. I’m trying to be nice here as apart from ‘first call’ it hasn’t gone to court yet, so it’s still only alleged.
This isn’t an official police report and is my own personal blog so It’s alleged that five piece of shit cunts did that coward dog act of ganging up against one dude who became separated from his mates. Because a one on one fight just wouldn’t be fair when you’re a piece of shit coward cunt.
I’m also alleging that Dilan was punched, kicked and bottled over the head and that Dilan stood his ground and fought back landing punches of his own.
I’m further alleging that whilst Dilan was on the ground these piece of shit cunts ripped his satchel off him that contained his wallet and some other shit and stole it.
When we got the phone call, we immediately picked him up and went straight to the cop shop to report it.
For any piece of shit cunts who may be reading this and reckon reporting shit to cops is snitching or a dog act, how about you go fuck yourself. The dog act is being a coward cunt in a pack to start with and all you cuntheads pretending to be ‘gangsta as’ or tough cunts are actually soft cock coward cunts in my eyes. Y’all only say shit like ‘snitches get stitches’ to deter ya victims from reporting shit ‘cos ya know ya not gunna get away with it if it’s reported, so fuck you, fuck off and go and get fucked cunt. None of us, including Dilan are intimidated by y’all..
Maybe try and be a decent human being. It’s actually a good feeling and good things happen to people who do good things. What comes around goes around.
We spent the entire night at hospital and shortly after we got home we heard that the coppers had charged two of the offenders and located some of Dilan’s gear in their car so a thank you to the responding and investigating officers for your efforts to date.
Dilan plays hooker and prop and was probably too pretty for a front rower anyway.
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